The egg diet: I ate 9 eggs a day for two weeks and it was awful

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    I ate 9 eggs a day for two weeks and it was awful
    (Picture: Getty)

    Eating nothing but eggs for an extended period of time is a diet craze that’s been around for a while.

    It can kick start extreme and rapid weight loss, which people use as a motivator to keep going with their diet goals.

    It would seem the Royal Marine Commando egg diet is gaining in popularity again.

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    The plan allows lean protein, fruit and veg, and the odd slice of toast as well as eggs during the regime, but you’re still severely depriving yourself of essential nutrients.

    Worryingly, the diet has been featured on pro-anorexia sites as a way to drop weight fast.

    There are many variations of the egg diet. Back in 2008, Nigella Lawson’s ex-husband, Charles Saatchi, ate nothing but eggs with the occasional slice of toast, losing 5 stone in the process.

    I ate 9 eggs a day for two weeks and it was awful
    Charles Saatchi (Picture: Getty)

    Egg sales rose once people heard of his results – but before you head down the shops to stock up, let me tell you about what happened to me when I decided to eat nothing but 9 eggs a day.

    What do you eat on the Royal Marine Commando Diet?

    According to the official website, this is the plan you should follow for 7 days.

    Day 1

    • Breakfast –  3 eggs
    • Lunch – 3 eggs
    • Dinner – 3 eggs

    Day 2

    • 1 egg or grapefruit
    • Fresh fruit salad
    • Steak, tomatoes, celery and cottage cheese

    Day 3

    • 1 egg or grapefruit
    • Fish, tomatoes, spinach and salad
    • Lean lamb chops, tomatoes and salad

    Day 4

    • 1 egg or grapefruit
    • Green salad and tomatoes
    • 3 eggs and dried toast

    Day 5

    • 1 egg or grapefruit
    • Fish, tomatoes and salad
    • Lean ham salad, tomatoes and spinach

    Day 6

    • 1 egg or grapefruit
    • 3 eggs dried toast
    • Steak, celery, tomatoes and cottage cheese

    Day 7

    • 1 egg or grapefruit
    • Fresh fruit salad
    • Lean lamb chops, salad and tomatoes

    When I was 20, I thought I’d go the whole hog one summer and get super fit for Uni.

    I had a solid two months to work on it, so I looked up various diets.

    The old-fashioned method – cutting the calories and tucking into a salad every evening – didn’t appeal.

    I needed something more extreme, dammit!

    Up popped the egg diet. ‘Eggs are full of nutrients, so this diet is good for you,’ one website told me.

    Because I believed everything on the Internet must be the truth, I ran out to the shops and bought two 30-packs of eggs from Tesco.

    I ate 9 eggs a day for two weeks and it was awful
    (Picture: Getty)

    Looking at them sat on the kitchen counter was empowering.

    I was in control.

    I was going to egg my way to a summer body.

    The next day I got up and dutifully boiled saucepans full of eggs.

    I opened the window after a while. It was getting pretty hot in the kitchen.

    It also smelled awful.

    Half an hour later, my mountain of eggs had been peeled, put in a bowl and left to cool.

    I was left with 3 hard boiled eggs for my first meal.

    ‘Bon appetit,’ I thought, popping an egg into my mouth and trying not to gag.

    I ate 9 eggs a day for two weeks and it was awful
    (Picture: Getty)

    On day 2, I woke up feeling like death.

    ‘Oh good, it’s breakfast time,’ I thought, jumping out of bed.

    I opened the fridge door.

    The stench of eggs slapped me in the face.

    I closed the fridge door.

    Because I’m a trooper, I kept downing 3 eggs at each meal for two weeks.

    On day 7, I stepped onto the scales.

    I’d lost 15 pounds.

    I ate 9 eggs a day for two weeks and it was awful
    (Photo: BSIP/UIG/Getty)

    Unfortunately, nobody wanted to stand close enough to me to check out how good I looked.

    This is because any form of low carb diet – let alone one where you eat nothing but eggs, which contain less than 1 carb each, on average – will put you into a state of ketosis.

    A side effect of ketosis is having breath that smells like something crawled into your mouth and died.

    I’d bought the strongest mouth spray I could find in Boots, but even that wasn’t enough to help me.

    The other physical side effects I got included having weakened fingernails.

    For those who know the pain of having a split fingernail – try having that happen to multiple nails on a regular basis.

    My hair was in poor condition, and my skin broke out in spots.

    I ate 9 eggs a day for two weeks and it was awful
    Every day was a bad hair day (Picture: Getty)

    The fatigue was also not worth losing weight so quickly.

    Oh, and if you’ve heard of being ‘egg bound’, you’ll know how much fun that was, too.

    FYI, that’s a polite way of saying I was constipated.

    So what did I learn from this experience?

    1. I’m an idiot.
    2. Don’t trust the Internet, no matter how many smiling avatars tell you eating nothing but eggs is a fantastic idea.
    3. Eggs smell awful if you boil 10 or more at once.
    4. You can get so traumatised by their stench you can struggle to smell them, let alone eat them, for a solid year after going through such an experience.
    5. Dropping so much weight is not worth feeling like utter sh*t and having nobody want to come near you.

    Don’t get me wrong – eggs are good for you, if eaten in moderation.

    Dr Bruce Griffin, an expert in egg research at the centre for nutrition and food safety at the University of Surrey, says: ‘Eggs make a nutritional contribution to a healthy, calorie-restricted diet’.

    Anna Denny, nutrition scientist at the British Heart Foundation, said that Saatchi’s egg-based diet is too restrictive to be healthy.

    ‘You have to think about what you are not eating on a diet like this. It is likely you are missing out on a lot of essential nutrients.

    ‘The result is that you would feel tired all the time, get lightheaded and feel nauseous as well as being prone to fainting.’

    In other words: not worth it.

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